The world is full of books, articles, movies and sitcoms that are aimed at women. And while some of this media might be empowering or informative, most of it is targeted to make women feel insecure. If you want to be a better partner for your girlfriend or wife, forget what Cosmo tells you and focus on these five things instead.
1. She wants you to be more vulnerable. In 2011, psychologist Dr. Robert Glover released a book called No More Mr. Nice Guy, which aimed to help men break out of the nice guy stereotype and become better partners for their wives and girlfriends in Jaipur. According to Glover, one thing that defines a "nice guy" is his aversion to showing vulnerability.
2. She wants you to stop trying to "fix" her. We all know the familiar trope of a man telling his female partner, "You'd feel so much better if you just did X instead of Y." Whether it's running errands on Saturday morning or getting rid of her cat because he's allergic, men tend to think they're capable of solving their partners' problems with ease. The reality is that she has to deal with her own issues—not you.
3. She wants you to be more ambitious. According to a study by the Council on Contemporary Families, women are increasingly attracted to men who have well-paid jobs and lofty career goals, especially when they're searching for long-term partners. And while it's not a good idea to rush into the first high-paying job you can get, it's important for men to have professional goals and put their time and energy into things that are important to them.
4. She wants you to stop being so defensive. If your relationship is going well, there shouldn't be a reason for you to constantly be on the defensive. If she has something to say to you, take it in stride and try to understand how she feels—rather than immediately jumping into a defense of yourself.
5. She wants you to stop worrying about what your exes are doing. You might not like hearing this one, but rest assured: Your girlfriend is less likely to compare you with one of your exes if there's nothing extraordinary going on in their lives. And no matter how much time has passed since your last breakup, most women will always remember at least some details about their relationships (or lack thereof) with these men.
A woman wants a man who can show her that he trusts her, is willing to work on his own issues, and is secure in himself. These qualities allow him to be understanding and not feel the need to "fix" or control her. He also needs to be able to take criticism and support her ambitions and goals in life instead of trying to put them down. A woman, be it your wife or girlfriend in Jaipur, doesn't want a man who feels the need to constantly defend himself or always makes sure his exes are doing badly so she knows he's better than them.